Friday, October 2, 2009

I must not tell lies, I must not tell lies

Approximately 6 weeks ago I made a reservation at a hotel to stay for an "extended" period of time. Well actually my reservation was for 3 days, but you get the idea.
I am driving on route in the middle of nowhere Maryland. My new Blackberry (that I am unable to operate)rings, and I answer, unsure if the state I am in allows talking while driving. It's the hotel. They tell me since I am not staying that long ,they will move me to the Holiday Inn next door. I ask if it allows dogs. It dosen't. "You're bringing a dog?". Yes, I am. Well there's a fee.
Now at this point in the story I should explain when I stay in hotels, I always stay in pet friendly ones. I usually don't mention the dog, to avoid the fee. My very honest friend KT ended up shelling out 150 dollars for 2 nights at a Hilton. I did not.
So my plan is to bring the cats in through the side entrance, on the DL.I arrive at the hotel, and ask for a room down the hall, "for the dog". They tell me they only have one room left. NEXT TO THE LOBBY. AS IN, YOU CAN SEE THE LOBBY FROM MY ROOM DOOR. CRAP.
Hmmm. Ok. Well after only telling them I have 1 dog, I can't say, well I forgot I have 2 cats, hope they can come in too. So I hatch a plan.
I place the 2 cats into Leroy's ginormus crate. (2 cats don't really care for each other, tolerate is better description). I place several large pillows over the cats, and hang a pillowcase over the front of the crate. I struggle to drag the big crate with 35 lbs of cat in it inside, and hope Teetums dosen't MEOW because he's freaked out. I put the crate down, and go to open the door.
My key dosen't work. After frantically trying several times to open the door, I determine that I have grabbed the hotel key from the night before.(They look the same! Stupid Dominoes advertising!) I leave cats in front of the door, begging them to be quiet, and sprint to the desk and ask for another key.
I get the cats in the room, phew! I'm home free. I open the door and go outside to get the litter box.
During my attempt to put the cats in a new carrier, I put the Tidy Cat liter bin into the front seat. Apparently upside down. Litter has now filled my front seat. Oh, ok, well, I can deal with that. I attempt to move the litterbox and litter into the hotel in a non suspicious black trash bag. The trash bag starts leaking in the parking lot. Litter, everywhere. In the parking lot. Now I'm piling litter into the litter box with my hands, hoping no one is looking out the window.
I get everything inside, leaving a litter trail to my room. No one has said anything yet.
I found a place to live. I used this as a reason to tell them about all 3 animals, and negotiated a place to live. We move tomorrow. When I leave with the cats, I don't think I will hide them.


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